OSCARS: STICKS AND STONES EH?

Sticks and stones. I'm not going to recite the old rhyme. We all know it. This, therefore, makes it all the more mystifying to me that we seem so loath to apply it to our own lives. Why, in a world full of so many tangible things that can hurt us, are we insistent upon taking offence at words?

Yes, language can hurt. I'm not denying the power of words. As someone hoping to make a living from writing and speaking words that'd be, at the very least, a stupid thing to do. I know that books and plays have moved people so powerfully that they've sent facist dictators and communist countries into panics of censorship and burning, I know that blasphemy and swearing are offensive to many people and I totally agree that it's appropriate to teach children to use words wisely. Like I say, I'm not suggesting that there shouldn't be boundaries, that words should be used willy nilly or that we relax the rules so as to attempt to diminish the potential power of words. What I'm saying is that 'taking offence' at jokes and the way in which people choose to express themselves is pointless, limiting, antisocial and downright childish. Not everybody in the world is articulate. Whether it's due to education, society, communication difficulties or a generation thing, everybody makes a verbal faux pas at some stage. It doesn't mean they don't mean well.

There are 7 billion people alive in the world. We span all ages, races, genders, religions and political ideals. We are not all going to agree. That's a given. I'm going to find something funny that Ahmed in Iran is going to find blasphemous. Ahmed is going to find something important that Oscar in Australia will write off as mere twaddle. And Oscar is going to find something sexy that Valerie in the US is going to find revolting. Some of you are going to find the fact that I used the generic name Ahmed for an Iranian man just a little bit racist. Probably. I'm sure someone will. What I don't understand is how, knowing this, we still race to debate, discuss and demand apologies after any joke or comment is made that can't be immediately identified as a non-offensive, all-inclusive statement.

I watched the Oscars. I saw Chris Rock made a speech about how easy it was to earn millions of dollars doing funny voices for animations. I laughed. And laughed. Rock took a risk, said something quirky, honest and with good humour. In doing so he lit up the stage, provoked a reaction and livened up the night. I identified. Working in the arts, though it has its challenges, doesn't exactly stack up next to the trials and tribulations of a brain surgeon. Let's remember that and not take ourselves too seriously. That doesn't diminish the skills, talent or commitment of the actors who make us smile and laugh at the animations we flock to see in our millions. But apparently some 'believe that Rock overstepped some boundaries in dissing fellow actors while presenting an award meant to honor their work'. Translated: Some people can't take a joke.

I'd actually say that I'm fairly conservative. I wouldn't say I 'rock the boat'. So when Billy Crystal glibly said “I loved that movie (The Help)…when I saw it, I wanted to hug the first black woman that I saw. Which from Beverly Hills is about a 45 minute drive", a little bit of me went all Guardian reader panicky. 'Can he say that?' 'Isn't it racist?' 'Is he undoing all the good work that's happening this moment by Hollywood paying homage to black actors?' No, no and no. You know how when you have a really close friend, you can say anything to them and they still know you love them? Yeah. That's kind of what's happening here. Why does Crystal need to tiptoe around the subject of race? He already said he loved the movie. His joke, if we're going to really investigate it, says that he feels positively towards black people. Also, if we're saying it wasn't funny, that's fine. It's fine because at least it was based in truth. Beverly Hills is not known for it's high population of black people. That's a comment my sister made recently whilst standing in Beverly Hills. That's something I, coming from a very multicultural part of London, noticed immediately when spending a week there. 45 minutes is an exaggeration of course but that's what comedy is. Taking the truth and exaggerating. Embellishing. So what's the issue? According to the twitter/blogger sphere:

@kimkane1 It bothers me that none of the writers stopped to think about the feelings of the other black actors and actresses in the room. It bothers me that some in the audience were so de-sensitized that they laughed out loud.

@thewanderingjew: Will Billy Crystal apologize for the racist joke? #oscars

@SALLevation: #BillyCrystalRacist #ThatsAll

@ch3ryl: @billycrystal shows his age in making a #racist joke about wanting to "hug a black woman" post The Help re: @OctaviaSpencer #oscars

emsmiley: So, according to #BillyCrystal, there are no black people in Beverly Hills...racist much?? #oscars" Very uncomfy moment.

'Billy Crystal controversially joked that he wanted to 'hug a black woman' after The Help' The Daily Mail

There are black people still very much considered a lower class in South Africa. There are murders and corruption of black people happening in England. There are hate crimes taking place against black people in America. There are kids suffering from race related bullying. So tell me why Billy Crystal's vaguely amusing but admittedly sub-par joke based entirely in truth, and in no way hostile, is in any way distasteful, disruptive or dangerous to our society. Please, tell me.

PS I like how Brande Victorian put it: 'Maybe I’m naive but I actually saw that joke as more of a commentary on the lack of black women in Hollywood—you know the very issue we’re screaming and kicking about every day...Overall, I think people are being a little too sensitive about Billy Crystal’s routine last night and we’re starting to find anything that touches on race to be racist. Pretty soon that double standard of black people being able to crack jokes about white people, but white people not being allowed to say anything about black folks is going to come back and bite us—hard.' **

* http://news.softpedia.com/news/Oscars-2012-Chris-Rock-Offends-with-Animation-Joke-255179.shtml
** http://madamenoire.com/141224/billy-in-blackface-racist-oscar-routine-isnt-a-big-hit/